Summer Treats

About two months ago, my dumpster-diving KitchenAid (don't worry, we bought our own accessories) gave up on me after a particularly large batch of cookies. And while a baking sabbatical is good for one's waistline, too long of a sabbatical can wither the soul. I'm hoping to save up for the kind of mixer that should last me until Kieran goes off to college; in the meantime, I have been scouring through my recipes and pins for desserts that can be made with a food processor or a good ol' wooden spoon.

First off, I made this berry pie a couple of different times. I just love all the colorful goodness in this one.

Then, I made Chef in Training's Banana Bars with Brown Butter Frosting a couple of times. The frosting? To. Die. For.

One of my favorites since college are these carmelitas. I like to make them with Mexican food – they sound like something you'd find on a menu at a Mexican restaurant, right? I also made this homemade caramel for the recipe, too!

Finally, I was really wanting a doughnut the other day, but, as a rule, I try to never buy them unless it's for church. And I abhor deep frying. All that mess and wasted oil … ugh. But I searched on Pinterest and found these Dirt Bombs (great title, right?), which are, essentially, doughnut muffins.

As I was mixing them together (in my food processor, of course) I had this feeling of déjà vu, and I realized that I had made almost this exact recipe before, when I made The Pioneer Woman's French Breakfast Puffs. Either way, they are yummy with your morning coffee! …Oh, and speaking of PW's recipes, I have had her lemon bars on the brain for quite awhile now. I just need for this heat wave to break so I can get to baking again!

Even if you don't have all the tools you would like, I hope you can get your bake on this summer, too. What are some of your recent favorite dessert finds?

P.S. I simply cannot forget to mention this homemade hot fudge! It's great to have on hand to bring to a get-together. Just grab a carton of vanilla ice cream (or make your own), and you're ready to go!

The Good Portion

{From my journal}

June 24, 2015

Everyday, I am sowing something, regardless of whether or not I am aware of it. By His grace, I want to start each day with Him, seek His wisdom and leading – wisdom that is "pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere" – so I can make the choices that lead to a "harvest of righteousness" which is "sown in peace by those who make peace."

Lord, I need so much help with this. Everyday, I choose to worship at the altar of self, often becoming frustrated when things don't go my way or they are harder than I'd hoped they would be. In my own strength, I can't find wisdom or peace, nor can I bear the kind of fruits that actually last. Pour out your mercy on me:  a woman, wondering how to do this thing called life as a daughter, sister, wife, mother, and friend. But most of all, as a sinner … saved by grace, without a doubt, but so easily enticed to choose the easier roads, not pushing to do the hard things that can lead to long-lasting rewards.

I am so weak and weary. Help me to seek and rely on Your strength and love and see my life transformed. Though I can sometimes be like Martha, "anxious and troubled about many things," help me to focus on the "one thing" that is necessary. Help me to choose "the good portion."

Amen and amen.

Even When My Eyes Can't See

Hope.

Brokenness. 

Have you ever faced a mountain so big that you cannot see over or around it? Has it seemed so permanent that you start to believe it will always, always be there and, rather than continually bringing it before God, you start to believe (though you may never say it aloud) that He doesn't care about that particular mountain?

Sometimes the world steals our hope and pride or fear steal our ability to be broken before God, and we simply give up. We find it easier to stop thinking about the insurmountable and focus on what we can do and what we can change. We pour our hearts into another project, another soul, all the while knowing that God is waiting, waiting for us to resume the trek He has set before us. "Let me climb that hill!" we cry out desperately. "These people need my attention!" we mutter in self-justification. We can't understand why God would have us take up the climb one more time, when we have no surety that we will ever reach the top.

This weekend, I had the opportunity to visit my grandma's church, down south.

The pastor talked about John 13, when Jesus washes the feet of His disciples – nothing I hadn't heard before. But as my heart was being crushed by this mountain, I was so ready for His Word to speak life to me. Jesus was doing something that confounded everyone. He took on the mantle of a servant and willingly did one of the dirtiest and lowliest jobs: washing the dirt and grime of traveling on dusty roads and through animal droppings off of the crusty feet of these working-class men (no male pedicures, here). And Peter – our beloved Peter with whom we can all identify – just could not comprehend why Jesus would do this, nor how he could allow his revered teacher to see and touch and smell the filth collected on his feet. And when Jesus explained that if he didn't allow Him to wash his feet, then he could have no part in Him, Peter cried, "Lord, not my feet only but also my hands and my head!"

As we sat in a chilly, air-conditioned room on a hot and muggy Sunday morning, we were reminded that Jesus was able to see past the sin of those closest to them to serve them physically and minister to their souls. That morning, what Jesus said to Peter struck me in a way it never had before:

"What I am doing you do not understand now, but afterward you will understand."

Sometimes, we just cannot understand why God seems to be so slow to answer. So we stop asking. We cannot understand how things will ever improve when they just seem to be getting worse. So we stop hoping. We begin to forget that, in all things, God is for us. So we stop running to God, asking Him to break our hearts once more.

For me, this mountain is the family I grew up in. And while I would never share all the details, it is enough to know that there are many broken and strained relationships and many, many hurts that happened even before I was born that are still bearing fruit today. While we spent several days away from home and with different family members, I came face-to-face with some of those and felt the weight of a broken, mostly unbelieving family press down on me again.

But one glorious event shone through, like suddenly stumbling upon a mountain pass.

I got to meet my little brother.

A brother I hadn't seen since he was six months old and I was five.

And I never, ever thought this would happen. At some point, it just seemed like too much time had passed for reconciliation to occur. And while everything was not perfect or golden, nor would I expect it to be, I saw God answering my prayers and the petitions of others. He gave me an overwhelming sense of peace and a deep-seated knowledge that He is still there, working in the midst of what so often seems like an impossible situation. And though I may not understand now, someday I will stand with Him on the brink of eternity, He will show me what He was doing, and I will understand.

Far be it from me to not believe

Even when my eyes can't see

And this mountain that's in front of me

Will be thrown into the midst of the sea

Through it all, through it all

My eyes are on You

It is well

Through it all, through it all

Our Three-Day Potty Training Experience

WE DID IT!!!

This kid is potty trained! :) I put all these shenanigans off time and time again until, finally, we just picked a weekend on the calendar and decided that unless an emergency came up it was time.

I had read the 3 Day Potty Training e-book awhile ago, so I went back and reviewed it. While the whole idea of getting it over and done with seemed very appealing, I was also super intimidated by how intense it sounded. You become your child's shadow and are responsible for running them to the bathroom anytime they are about to have an accident. You remind them a million times to, "Tell Mommy or Daddy if you feel like you have to go potty." But do you know what? It was great!

The first day is just weird for a potty-training novice. Neither you or your child know what is going on. We started out the morning last Saturday in his very last diaper from the evening before and waited until after breakfast to change him. First, we made a very big deal about Kieran giving all of his diapers to his little brother (who goes up a size in diapers at bedtime). We had him throw away the one he was wearing, and put on his own underwear. … He was pretty hesitant at first, "No! I don't want underwear!" Even though he was excited about it the night before, there was still some uncertainty. 

And then, we waited.

And waited.

And waited.

Since he had already gone in his morning diaper, he didn't have to go to the bathroom again for another two or three hours – even with all of the fluids we were pumping into him. When he did finally have to go, we kind of failed at the whole point of the three-day method and didn't get him to the bathroom in time to finish over the toilet. In fact, the first two or three times we didn't get him there fast enough because he would make a little whimpering noise, and by the time we got there, he was done. We just told him it was "yucky" and reminded him to tell us as soon as he felt like he had to go potty because we wanted to keep our underwear, "dry!"

The first day felt pretty unproductive, but we were so proud of him when he woke up with dry underwear! By the end of the first day and into the second day, he was able to get to the potty and finish in it but not keep his underwear dry. And by sometime the third day, he was able tell us he needed to go and keep his underwear dry!! I'll tell ya, folks, it feels good to cross this bridge and say, "Goodbye," to four diapers a day.

Now, of course, there are still some things we need to work on. In the week that has passed since we started potty training, he has only ever gone in our bathroom. The one time he needed to go when we were out of the house, he had an accident because he was scared to use their bathroom. He has also never gone for anyone but Mom or Dad, so it may be interesting the first time he has to go at church or if someone else is watching him. Then, of course, there is the dreaded "number two." The first time was an emotional disaster that didn't get anywhere close to the bathroom, while the second time was extremely successful – in the potty from start to finish. And McDonald's ice cream cones for everyone! But one success does not guarantee the next.

Needless to say, I am pretty proud of my boy. It's scenes like this, though, that keep us humble.

Somebunny's Three

Was this just two years ago?

Everyone in our house was getting excited for K's birthday. Even Elias was getting in on the game, and a week later, he's still singing, "Happy birthday to you." Kieran did NOT like his three-year appointment … until the sucker came out! He weighed in at 29.6 pounds (28th percentile) and measured 25.25 inches (7th percentile). We stopped for chicken nuggets, and Kieran scored some free birthday cookies!

Elias enjoyed a little, too. :)

On his actual birthday, we met up with some friends at a park halfway between our towns. It was fun to spend the morning with friends and to try out a new place!

For dinner, Kieran requested hamburgers, so we had sliders and hot dogs and other grilling fare and, of course, cake!

I made an ice cream cake, and he loved it! It was super easy, too. I softened some chocolate ice cream and spread it into an 8x8 pan lined with plastic wrap, then let it set in the freezer. I made some hot fudge, let it cool some, then layered that on top of the ice cream. After layering some crushed Oreos on top of the fudge, I again let it set in the freezer. A layer of softened vanilla ice cream and another stint in the freezer, and it was ready to be inverted onto a cutting board. I "frosted" it with Cool Whip and topped it with green sprinkles, more crushed Oreos, and a little John Deere tractor. 

We had some family over to celebrate, and we all enjoyed watching Kieran open his presents. Little did we know that we all got him something vehicle-related.

In some things, little boys are easy to please. :)

A couple days later, this boy was over-the-moon excited just to be able to sit on the mowers at Lowe's.

I already posted something mushy about my little man turning three, so I'll spare you that. But we sure do love this boy to pieces!